the new term for farting is butt boxing.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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