You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
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