You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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