My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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