Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I pour the whiskey from now on
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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