just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
As shirtless as possible
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
