What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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