we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize