You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
