I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
