i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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