Walk of Shame. In a state park.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Hello my rib-scented angel!
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
