Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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