from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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