Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
