I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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