Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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