Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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