come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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