So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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