First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
is this the sara with the beer cane?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
