the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
