It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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