I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
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Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
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I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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