Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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