I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
