i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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