Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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