My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
