we're blogging at a bar
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
