no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize