i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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