PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
