Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
