I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
