people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize