On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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