wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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