You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
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She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
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I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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