i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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