We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize