I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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