hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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