I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
