You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
