respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize