Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
