I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Randomize