They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize