Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
