Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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