I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
